start

You are me, in another dimension. You are me, floating naked in the sea. You are my sisters, my friends, their shaping hands, You are my mother, my cells. You are the moon - blood, rhythm, tides.

You are my body.

This is the story of how we grew distant and became separated. I want to tell you what I was up to, when we didn’t know each other. And finally I’ll recount how we met again, first as allies, then friends, then lovers.

helena is inspired by Meg-John Barker's plural selves zine. helena represents Isobel's earth mother self. she has never known a society where women are subjugated and white men are the binary ruling opposite. if she were a person she would strongly oppose the plundering of the earth and each others bodies for money and power.
Isobel loves London and New York. helena hates anywhere that you cannot be barefoot.
Isobel respects and loves the pill for its potential to liberate menstruators. helena thinks natural cycles, in all forms, are the most holy of all things.
She would only ever do drugs as part of a shamanic ritual.
Isobel suspects many people have a helena who is calling out to be listened to, and culturally is often answered by a shadow projection of cynicism towards alternative medicines and practices.

this is a story about menstruality.
living radically in a cyclical body.
and sex.

16/6/20

Today I went running with two sports bras on. I knew if I didn't run today I wouldn't sleep tonight. But my boobs hurt so much I couldnt walk down the stairs without holding on to them, despite also enduring wearing a single sports bra all day for the past week. I couldn't really breathe properly in these two bras, my lungs were burning and my shoulder blades crushed together. Normally I can run for twenty minutes without much difficulty. When I got to 5 minutes today, I turned back. Not without an internal struggle though - feeling weak and all that. But honestly if i cant say no to myself who can i say no to